Lessons I have learnt

  • A woman considers it very romantic if you simply sit together and watch a romantic comedy
  • The effect is somewhat diminished if, every time a main character speaks, you roll on the floor goraning in agony, attempting to beat yourself unconscious by ramming your head against a coffee table.

I have also learnt to understand the subtleties of a woman's body language.

When you play her a new album, you can be certain that she does not number it amongst her most valuable possessions if:

  • She rips it from the CD player and hurls it out of the window.
  • Later, when she finds it in the garden she stamps it into the dirt and kicks it out onto the street
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