3 differences between 'Small Business' and 'Enterprise'
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3 differences between 'Small Business' and 'Enterprise'

Part A:

  1. Under the covers, a "Small Business" is usually run by a random collection of access databases and excel spreadsheets that are poorly implemented, terribly managed, and provide meaningless results.
  2. An "Enterprise" is the same thing, but includes a batch file which checks if the other systems have crashed, and then restarts them.

Part B:

  1. In a "Small Business" the random collection of access databases and excel spreadsheets are kept around because They Get The Job Done.
  2. In an "Enterprise" the random collection of access databases and excel spreadsheets are kept around because they are jealously guarded by cranky middle managers who treat them as the precious jewels of their tiny land-locked fiefdoms, deep within their meaningless cubicle kingdom.

Part C:

  1. In a "Small Business" the random collection of access databases and excel spreadsheets were written by the business owner, as he or she grew the business.
  2. In an "Enterprise" the random collection of access databases and excel spreadsheets were written by idiot-nephews of dysunctional middle managers and are maintained by spineless, highly-paid consultants who should know better and will be first against the wall when the next round of redundancies arrive.

What did I miss?





'Michael L Perry' on Wed, 03 Dec 2008 10:22:51 GMT, sez:

You missed the jounior developer originally hired to maintain that Access database who is now the architect working on the SOA version that will never see the light of day.



'Malcolm Groves' on Wed, 03 Dec 2008 10:57:06 GMT, sez:

In an Enterprise, the random collection of access databases and excel spreadsheets will be the focus of an effort to replace them with a bright shiny ERP system at least every 2 years. After much consultant-hiring and cash-burning, the ERP system will lay neglected and the business will continue to run on Access and Excel, until the next management change and it'll all start again..

In a small business, you'll pry the Access database and Excel spreadsheets from the owners cold dead hands.



'Troy Tuttle' on Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:08:15 GMT, sez:

You might add that the Enterprise group will start a large and hugely expensive project to replace all the access and excel apps with a all-in-one data warehouse / BI initiative, only to take 3 years and still not have a full software release.



'lb' on Wed, 03 Dec 2008 22:13:21 GMT, sez:

>junior developer originally hired to
>maintain that Access database who is now
>the architect working on the SOA version
>that will never see the light of day.

Ah yes, I left that out because the accountant who learnt to record VBA macros, and thus became the Chief CIO distracted me.

btw --

Someone twittered recently that the only things to survive a nuclear holocaust would be cockroaches and excel VBA.

I see a future where mutated super strong Excel VBA macros are in control of marauding herds of gigantic cockroaches.

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